On Home Envy

There’s a feeling that I sometimes get when scrolling past the perfectly styled homes on Pinterest or Instagram, or when I visit a friend’s new house, or when I stumble across a stunning design blog. I’m wondering if you know this feeling—a gnawing in your gut, a longing for what you can’t have, a twinge of jealousy—home envy. 

It can be easy to wish that we had a different home, more money in our bank account for trendy decor, or simply the time and energy to create a home that reflects and serves our family well.

We can find ourselves wishing that our circumstances were different, when what we should be doing is checking out heart, mind, and motives.

Home envy can be a real struggle, and I don’t think I’m alone in feeling it from time-to-time. So what are some ways we can fight home envy?

1. Take Intentional Breaks from Social Media

Something that I started doing in July that has been incredibly helpful in curbing home envy is to have one social media free day a week. I know some people do social media free weekends, while others take more extended breaks. Do what works for you!

I’ve chosen Sundays to take my break… so on Saturday night I move my Instagram app from front and center on my phone to its own page so I’m not tempted to scroll without thinking. I also removed Facebook from my phone a couple months ago, which has helped me be less attached to social media and my phone in general.

Removing myself from the world of social media, even for a day, helps me refocus on being present and enjoying what’s right in front of me.

2. Be Grateful for What You Have

When I’m tempted to envy what others have or how beautiful their homes are, I try to remind myself how incredibly privileged I am and that many people don’t even have a home to compare to others’.

I talk to God about it, thanking Him for all the wonderful things He’s placed in my life, and try to move my focus from material things to things of more importance.

Keeping a gratitude journal, remembering to voice thanksgiving in your prayers, or sharing what you’re thankful for with a friend or family member are all great ways to practice gratefulness and fight envy.

3. Take a Reality Check

Another powerful weapon in fighting off envy is a reality check. When I’m tempted to despair about how my home looks like compared to the ones I see on Instagram, I try to remind myself of the reality of the situation. Often things are staged and not what they seem behind-the-scenes.

I also think about the difference in budget, time, and years of experience when I compare myself to other professional designers. My budget is where it’s at, I only have so much time leftover after my day job, and I’m only 27 years old!

This reminder of reality can be so helpful for me as I compare my home to other homes I see. Obviously, my main goal is to get to a point where I’m not comparing at all, but when I do find myself in the comparison game, I find that a quick reality check helps to put things into perspective.

Bonus: Bring in Some Help

If you still find yourself suffering from bouts of home envy, but you have the means (but perhaps not the time or skills) to fix it, by all means, do! I would love to serve you by helping you create a functional and cozy home that cultivates contentment and joy! I offer consulting, styling, and full room re-designs… check out my services here, and please contact me to get the conversation rolling on how we can overcome home envy in your life!